How life can be interesting. How life can just sort of flow on by. I have always been the kind of person who at times, does not always live in the moment. I mean, I enjoy good moments, but when they are gone, I often think to myself: “I could have enjoyed that more, or made better use of it.” A perfect example, is travelling. I love to travel and am fortunate enough to have travelled a lot, and I have more travels in my future. My first time in Paris, I was in awe, and when I returned, I wished I had done more….felt more. However, it also encouraged me to return so that I could chase that feeling again. I am also not sure that I squander time. I might just think I do.
So, here I am. 49 and almost 50. I have passed through some stages of life, and at a new, sort of old one again. The teenage years are too far gone to reflect on, however, this year marked a change, as after 22.5 years of living with children in my life, they are both off on their own, so I find myself living the life of a 25 year old, with 50 year old knees. So, where to now?
In the last 22.5 years, there were times when I made choices in my activities and lifestyle based on our family dynamics. Please do not interpret this as regret, it could not further from the truth, but now I find myself with more time, to concentrate on other things. I have longed over the years to do more things with my time….more hobbies…more writing music, more performing music….more recording music….more language learning (francais et Українська), more photography, more woodworking….more history books, more exercise….more learning how to make dry saucisson……more house cleaning!
So, here I am. I have arrived. In five years, will I feel like I squandered the time, as I sometimes felt I have in the past, or will I have recorded my CD and posted in iTunes, completed the two podcasts I want to do, built better cabinets, have 25 000 more photos and speak passably in three languages, and of course, have a cleaner house and be ripped?
I guess time will tell. And, if any of you are silently, or not so silently ranking these plans based on likelihood of success, I would not hold my breath about the ripped part, nor bet the bank.